Why I Cry at Christmas

Its officially 6 minutes into Christmas Eve which means among other things, that Santa is probably up at the north pole right now doing the final inspections on the sleigh and the list before the big run tonight. It also means I should be in bed which is heavily evidenced by that last sentence.

Just plain silliness.

Everyone knows Santa checks the list like weeks before Christmas.

Ok, I know what I wanna say so I'll make it quick.
I love Christmas time because regardless of whether or not its "how it should be", in the time surrounding Christmas more than any other time in the year, people's hearts and minds are seemingly more geared towards thoughts of things bigger than themselves. Whether thats God or family or generosity or thankfulness. Culture just seems to be saturated with these kinds of ideas (even if they are just being used as a ploy to sell more crescent rolls).

Heres my point. I say a lot of things about God and Christ and a bigger picture where we are all living lives in light of eternity. I talk about this stuff all the time, like I'm getting paid for it.

And some of you don't believe it.

A lot of you don't believe it.

Some of you believe some of it but not all of it. I can't begin to think that I know whats in anyone's heart. But I know a lot of what's in my heart and if I didn't believe in something but I had a friend that kept pushing it on me like I was less of a human without it, I'd get really tired of hearing it. And I'd probably start to wonder if they even cared about me or if it was more just some weirdo contest to see if they could convince me over to their side. Like that would somehow validate what they're doing. Maybe you think those things about me.

I can't know unless you tell me.

But I can tell you this.

I've gone with my family to church every Christmas Eve for the last 20 years. And every year I fight back tears. Tonight I went to church and sung the same songs we always sing and heard the same message I always hear and I still cried at the thought of it.

God pursuing me.
Jesus coming for me.
to suffer for me.
to heal me.
to save me.

Because me=
broken
hurt
scared
nervous
insecure
lonely
selfish
guilty

And God.
Because of Jesus.
Doesn't care about
any.
of that.

And so I.
Because of Jesus.
Don't have to cary
any.
of that



Which frees me to give and serve and have

Joy.
Peace.
Love.


And thats what I want for you. That's why I keep saying the same things. Because 20 years in and its still bringing me to tears.

Merry Christmas!